Why would a man love another man

A few weeks ago, when I was having dinner with my MBA course mates, we touched on the topic of homosexuality. One of them asked, “Why would a man love another man?”

Not so long ago, a self-professed gay pastor, Ow Yang Wen Feng, caused uproar among the Christian community in this country when he expressed his wish to set up a church here.

In the U.S., Senator Larry Craig, who was known for his conservativeness, was recently arrested for lewd conduct in a men’s bathroom, suggesting that he might have been engaging in gay sex.

So now I am pondering on this question: Why would a man love another man? Or, for that matter, why would a woman love another woman?

Some say a person’s sexual orientation is determined at birth, or perhaps during conception. Majority of Christian churches, of course, insist that homosexuality is a learned behavior and call on all gays and lesbians to repent. They tell us many stories of ex-gays/lesbians who renounced the ‘sinful act’ and married people of opposite sex.

However, I am skeptical of these stories. Even if a gay man marries a woman, that doesn’t mean he has already become heterosexual. It is possible that he does so out of social or religious pressure. Rev. Ow Yang, mentioned earlier, had a wife too, but their marriage ended in divorce. Senator Craig, on the other hand, is still married to a woman.

The next question is: How many Malaysians are homosexuals?

I am reading a book, Microtrends, written by Mark Penn, a polling analyst. According to the author, about 5 percent of U.S. adults are homosexuals, two thirds of whom are men. That is, about 1 in every 15 men is gay, and 1 in every 30 women is lesbian. (That's a lot! )

If we assume, for the moment, that homosexuality is indeed a born trait, I expect same percentage of Malaysians are non-straight too. However, I don’t notice many gay men or lesbians around. Perhaps they are less willing to disclose their sexual preference compared to their counterparts in the West. After all, we live in a conservative society.