Thursday, October 01, 2009

Teenagers and Sex

Forbidden fruit by Daniela Uhlig

This is my first post about sex. But no worry, this is not an 18SX material.

I recall somebody mentioned that teenage girls who were sexually active tended to have low self-esteem. But the reverse was true for teenage boys. Boys who were sexually active tended to have high self-esteem.

I do not know if there is a proof for these statements, but they certainly make sense. Young girls who have low self-esteem use their bodies to gain acceptance, or love, among guys. Or they like to boast about their sexual encounters among their peers. Guys, on the other hand, simply treat sexual activities as a physiological fulfillment or power over the weaker sex.

Assuming that the statements are true, what are the implications? Now, if we want to discourage teenage sex, we should give more attention to the girls. We can’t tell the boys to lower their esteem, but we certainly can help raise the self-esteem of the girls.


  1. blame it on failture of education ? >.<"

  2. Treat sex as a normal activity, but the consequences of casual sex should be made known to all. The rest is up to the individual for self control and decision.

    Self esteem takes shape since childhood education/life, and is not easy to reverse once the pattern has formed....

  3. 無可否認年輕人愈來愈早熟
    大家要好好 教育他們

  4. It's a fallacy that certain things help to build self esteem. Self esteem cannot be built from the outside. Just my two cents.

  5. 迷迭香
    Don't get me wrong. I am not saying that thing is so bad.

    Actually self-esteem is probably shaped at birth. But not sure if it is difficult to reverse.


    Mei Ting
    Thanks for your input, but can you quote your source?

    According to Wikipedia, there are several domains where people derive their self-worth, such as:
    1. virtue
    2. God's love
    3. support of family
    4. academic competence
    5. physical attractiveness
    6. gaining others' approval
    7. outdoing others in competition

    It does sound like something can be done. You are a Christian so I guess you understand #2.

  6. i would say the self-esteem is actually shaped with the upbringings of the families. i noticed that some of my friends who have lower self esteems are those who are from broken/complicate families. so i think one day we are parents ourselves, we must set good examples

  7. Wow so even Wiki shows people how to improve self esteem. I only believe #2 works.

    I have seen destructive behaviour(s) as a result of pursuing things to improve one's self esteem.

    Again, just my two cents.

  8. Well...sometimes...teenage girls have this void...and they wanna fill it by having sex? Of course not all teenage girls! :(

    Then again...some of them did it just for fun! :(

  9. i think friends is the main problem.

  10. 说易行难。现代的性教育的成效不大,因为青少年太开放了。。。

  11. self-esteem comes with self-confidence..

  12. xin
    Well said. Thanks.

    Mei Ting
    #1 can lead to #2. I have a feeling that you are virtuous.

    Of course I am not saying all teenage girls.

    Yes, friends are a major influence. But those with strong family support may be able to defy the 'norm'.


    You're right.

  13. The pic is very nice! When you wanna write a 18sx post le?

  14. LOL at Neo's comment. So yes, when you want to come put with a 18SX post? I'll be waiting! Haha!

  15. I mean out, not put. Typo : )

  16. Neo, foongpc
    18SX materials will have to be posted in a separate blog lah...

    Thanks :)

  17. Correction, I am not virtuous, really. I am just like any ordinary person walking in the street. Just that I don't believe in pursuing certain things to improve one's self esteem.